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India has the highest number of dowry-related deaths globally and the numbers are alarming. As per the statistics released by the Indian National Crime Record Bureau, a woman dies every hour and this is the case when dowry-related crimes are largely underreported.

Although the current generation pretends to be marrying with no demands, just behind the scenes the groom merrily accepts expensive gifts claiming that the bride’s family wasn’t compelled but gifted it out of their own free-will.

In such a scenario, a matrimonial website decided to highlight the problem. Earlier last year, the same site also launched a #NoToBigFatWedding campaign to promote sweet and simple weddings.

Nikah Forever, an Indian Matrimony site initiated a #dowryfreeindia campaign wherein victims could share their dowry oppression stories. Their intent through the move is to reduce dowry-related violence and uproot this practice. They have even launched a web survey related to the topic.

Within a span of one month, the portal has recorded numerous heart-wrenching stories.

For the past one month, we had been driving the conversation around dowry reporting statistics and stories in a bid to educate users. We had been reaching out to social activists to gather a larger support base. That is when users started sharing their stories through direct messages on our page and we got this idea of building a platform to take the conversation forward,” Nikah Forever’s CEO and founder Hammad Rahman told LifeBeyondNumbers.

The CEO envisions a dowry-free country and started the social campaign on December 18 last year striving to achieve the same.

 

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A post shared by Nikah Forever (@nikahforever)

Nikah Forever’s social media handles, those on Instagram and Facebook, laid the seed for this idea which went viral instantly. Till now, around 6,589 people have shared their stories. The matrimony has sought prior permission from users to share their stories and the collection will be shared with NGOs working in this space and also by the public to drive awareness.

Below are some of the true excerpts shared by the victims.

Our family had made it clear to my husband’s parents prior to marriage that we are strictly against dowry but they still gifted me a lot of household appliances to settle down in Mumbai. I am a single child and so they would continue to do so. This set the expectations high and my husband started to demand such gifts. Initially, it was fine but the demands kept increasing. This is when we took a stand, sat down with their family, and cleared it out – once and for all. It did deteriorate our relationship for a short while but he later understood and agreed,” Neha Singh, 27, Dehradun.
I am from a middle-class family and I had been enrolled in a Ph.D. program so I didn’t agree to my parent’s wishes to get married. Our background is a bit conservative and the relatives kept nagging us. Once we started searching for matches, we didn’t find good ones as I was 30. I finally got married but it was a traumatic experience. The groom’s family started pushing us for dowry and we were compelled to do so. It didn’t stop there and soon he started hitting me. I already had a beautiful son so I was tattered and torn. I tried communicating it to my family but they kept on saying how I should adjust. I am now legally separated and still fighting legally for the son’s custody,” anonymous, 34, Female, Noida.

Nikah Forever had requested its followers to post a picture of them with a red-cross drawn on their hands symbolizing taking a stand against dowries following which they have received thousands of pictures in support which were subsequently posted on their social media handles driving a larger support base.

Of them, blogger Shahnazararoof stood out by posting a soul-stirring image of herself dressed as a dowry victim. She has emerged as the face of the campaign.

 

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A post shared by UNICORN HIJABI 🦄 (@shahnazaraoof)

Sharing her thoughts with LifeBeyondNumbers, Shahnaz said, “Sadly we live in a world where women are constantly undermined and the mindset has nothing to do with education. Rather when a groom is more educated he openly or secretly wishes for more dowry. They call it gifts these days but they are nothing but an additional burden on the bride’s family.

Why I chose to use such makeup is because I wanted to create an impact and show people the ugly side of their demands. I am a common girl and to be heard I needed to do something offbeat and meaningful,” added the mother of a young girl who is constantly supported by her loving husband.

The matrimony site conducted a survey which has been shared for publication to German research company Statista.

Here are its key findings:

  • 99% of men have responded that dowry is not necessary for marriage.
  • 43% of respondents feel that the groom also suffers in the marriage due to dowry.
  • 54% of people have witnessed someone getting abused due to a dowry-related issue.
  • 87% of respondents agree that new laws or amendments are needed in the laws to ensure dowry is not practiced in our society.

What is your take on the menace?

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