“If I did die, it would shock people, but it wouldn’t surprise anybody. And that’s a very scary thing to be living with.” These words from Matthew Perry’s memoir, “Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing” are haunting me now. As a society, we still have a long way to go in understanding and empathizing with individuals battling depression and addiction. It’s a journey we all must have walked at some point in time in our lives, echoing the courage displayed by celebrities like Demi Lovato, Deepika Padukone, and others, who dared to bare their souls for the sake of a more compassionate world.
I’ve always loved the TV show “Friends.” I can recall full episodes with dialogues without needing any reference material. It’s an integral part of my upbringing and, I’m sure, for many ’90s kids. Yet, this piece isn’t about my love for Chandler Bing and his sarcasm; it’s about the profound impact of a celebrity opening up about addiction, knowing that their vulnerability could help others who are suffering in silence.
The world is becoming lonelier by the day, and Matthew Perry’s constant struggle with addiction serves as a stark reminder that reaching out is always better than suffering alone. It takes immense courage to be as open as he’s been about his battle with addiction. Unfortunately, some celebrities in the past were ruthlessly trolled when they shared their ordeals about depression, discouraging many of their contemporaries. I vividly remember Billie Eilish being trolled when she opened up about her struggles.
I learned about Matthew Perry’s sobriety long after “Friends” ended. While watching the series, I used to wonder why his appearance and weight kept changing after each season. Immaturely, I would judge him, brushing it off by saying, “I knew something was wrong with him.” That’s it. Without getting into what he must be going through while battling this ordeal? Addiction is indeed a challenging battle, but why does it have to label people as “wrong” to the extent that we don’t want them in our society? Matthew Perry, for many reasons, was torn apart by the press and fans alike.
Videos of the 2021 “Friends: The Reunion” were inundated with comments disguised as well-meaning concern about how Perry was slurring his words. Newer photographs of him posted on the internet led users to lament how different he looked, labeling his transformation as ‘sad’ and ‘heartbreaking.’ Did it matter that these comments came at a time when he was finally happy, sober, and reforming his life? He was slowly rebuilding himself, and yet the world seemed to mercilessly belittle him.
For me, the news of Matthew Perry’s passing from a distant continent deeply affected me, underscoring the profound portrayal of his most memorable character- “Chandler Bing” and the solace he brought to the people worldwide. His death serves as a stark reminder of the relentless and unforgiving nature of addiction, highlighting the formidable challenges faced by individuals such as Perry, even those with the financial means to access the best medical treatments, on their path to recovery, happiness, and inner peace.
In a society where substance abuse issues are still treated as moral and personal failures instead of serious medical disorders, Matthew Perry dared to be extremely vocal and profoundly vulnerable about his struggles. It’s this vulnerability that we must not forget: when someone – anyone – bares their soul to us in the hopes of making the world a better place, we must respect them enough to not be careless with their most personal feelings.
Deepika Padukone, the renowned Bollywood actress, was vocal about her battle with depression. Her openness about her experience served as a beacon of hope for many.
Virat Kohli, the Indian cricket captain, recently opened up about taking a 30-day break from the sport. His confession that it hit him that he didn’t touch the bat for 30 days showcases Virat’s vulnerability.
Kalki Koechlin, a prominent Bollywood actress, shared her struggle with postpartum depression. In a world where motherhood is often idealized, Kalki’s candidness was a reminder that it’s essential to destigmatize postpartum depression and provide support to new mothers who may be silently suffering.
As I think about the courage of celebrities who openly share their battles, they’ve taught me that when someone shares their challenges, it’s not just about being compassionate and understanding, but about forging a real connection. Through their experiences, I’ve discovered the strength that lies in embracing our vulnerabilities. These celebrities have not only inspired me, but they’ve reinforced a belief I hold dear – that we should create a society where mental health and addiction are taken seriously.
Remember- to be lonely is one thing, but to suffer in silence is not!