One can never replace a mother, they say and that’s actually a fact. But not everyone is blessed to have her around them.
Such misfortune fell on a retired Army Colonel’s family when his wife passed away, leaving their daughter who was pregnant. The presence of a mother when a girl is expecting is extremely vital as it is only a mother who will understand the physical and emotional needs of another mother. But in his wife’s absence, this father played her mother’s role, giving all the support he possibly could.
Retired Colonel of the Indian Army, Sanjay Pande not only bore the pain of losing his partner but also stood in her shoes to fulfill what she couldn’t. In a Twitter thread, he shared his struggle when his wife passed away, and how he cared for his pregnant daughter in her absence.
In his first tweet, he wrote that his wife passed away more than a year back, and that is when he learned that he was going to be a granddad. He should have felt useless as per tradition, but he was a fighter and wanted to help in any way he could.
Take a look at the Twitter thread.
Also, read: This Doting Single Father Deserves A Mother’s Day Hug For It Takes A Strong Man To Be A Mom
1. My wife passed away and a year plus later my daughter informed me that I was going to be a grand dad soon. Traditionally, I, father, as lone surviving parent, would have been most useless guy around in pregnancy days, post pregnancy period, baby’s growth etc. I was a fighter.
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
Colonel Pande explained how he decided to be his expecting daughter’s ‘mother’ since the latter was not around anymore. He did all sorts of research but then he was in Delhi and his daughter in the UK which posed even more challenges.
2. I decided to be my daughters ‘mother’. Right from the day she informed me, I planned her traditional diet, learnt by researching through nights, YouTube, elders, books and everything I could lay my hands on. The FIRST batch of laddus for 30 days was ready. Problem? Delhi & UK!
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
The distance made things inconvenient but he took care of each and every minute thing that his daughter would need and sent them with great care with the fastest delivery service.
3. Vaccum packing machine, food grade plastics, freezing laddus for 96 hrs, packing as sending them by parcel to UK!!! The first lot saved my daughters life since she was eating nothing. 15 days later the second different type of laddus were made and frozen. 21st day dispatched!
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
He mentioned how he went ahead and prepared everything for his daughter to ensure that she has a nutritious diet that is usually expected from a mother during the time of her daughter’s pregnancy.
4. The cycle started. Every type of healthy & nutritious food that a traditional Indian mother would give to her daughter, was made by me personally. Hygiene, calculation of nutrients, calories, weight of laddus, storing technique etc. all were meticulously written down.
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
On top of that, the coronavirus-induced pandemic was an obstacle for him but he managed to take care of his daughter just like his wife would have. However, he still had a lot to do.
5. Eighth month, Seventh, Sixth, Fifth, Fourth, Third, Second and the month of due date. I fed her nutrients from here. CoVID did not permit travel. All eight months she was fed in UK what she would have got here. Now my challenge in July was WHAT to feed her post-pregnancy?
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
The concerned father kept sending more items to his daughter living in the UK every month to ensure that her health remains intact even after she had given birth.
6. Again research, foods & super foods helping in lactation or increasing milk etc was studied and the first lot was dispatched in August. It continued for each month. I visited UK and made in bulk. Whether it was Garden Cress, Edible Gum, Methi, Shatawari or many such things,
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
7. I became master. Mixing ingredients, balancing calories and seeing the effect with own eyes. From Jan 19 to date, the flow of this special mothers food was given by me, a father, to my daughter. It continues. It’s been a year that the grand kid feeds on my Laddu as start of
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
8. day. Today I have perfect recipes of more than 12 laddus that women require from conception to the baby crossing a year of age. I feel so proud of myself that I did not let my wife down. My daughter swears by me and refuses to touch anything given by others. Interesting?
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
The Retired Colonel concluded his thread by saying that he realized that whatever he did was his duty as a parent. Netizens praised him for his gesture and he thanked them for all the love.
9. I never realised that what I did from Jan 2019 up to today was anything but my duty. A random thought triggered the thread today. I am amazed at response, comments, suggestions & kind words from Twitter friends. Admitting unashamedly, you all made me cry today. Love you all.
— Col Sanjay Pande (Retd) (@ColSanjayPande) May 8, 2022
Colonel Pande’s tribute to his late wife
Colonel Sanjay Pande’s wife Savita passed away in 2017, after which he started an initiative aptly “SAVITA” (Sustainable And Valuable Initiative for Timely Assistance).