“I used to think of acceptance as finding myself beautiful – and I too have realized that beautiful and ugly are different for different people and one can choose to be neutral.,” says Pallavi, one of the co-hosts of Fat. So?
Today, the definition of beauty has completely changed the way we look at people. Also, Ads that exhibit certain creams to prettify one’s appearance has idolized the fair face of a human. And the world is filled with preconceived notions of “how one should look”.
Thin. Fat. Short. Tall. All these judging parameters are redefining the existing looks of one’s persona. Not to mention, the never-ending promotions of beauty products by top influencers to make it to the front page of a commercial magazine.
Body-shaming or fat-shaming is termed as bullying. And this is more common in this era of social media. To change that perspective and break the weight-based discrimination, Pallavi Nath and Ameya Nagarajan started Fat. So? – a podcast to talk about what it means to live in a fat body.
In conversation with LifeBeyondNumbers, they shared why it is important to feel comfortable with your body and what inspired them to start this community initiative.
Pallavi is an MBA graduate from IIM Indore and has worked in HR and business management for 18 years. She describes herself as “fat, female, forty, divorced, business consultant, brain-based-coach, energy aligner”. Ameya has four degrees. She wrote a popular blog about dating in Delhi, set up the Indian Express podcast network, and used to commission books for Penguin India. She describes herself as a “cook, cat lady, fluent Spanish speaker and always reading”.
These two cool ladies have started and co-host “Fat. So?”, a podcast that discusses several topics that are wholly related to fat liberation.
Although, after brainwashing, everyone has their definitions and concepts about beauty. “We as individuals need to change our narrative and be logical about beauty. Because the only way to change this is to reject those beauty standards and accept yourself,” adds Pallavi.
Our book recommendation: You Have The Right To Remain Fat
How Fat. So? was born
In 2019, Pallavi was invited by Tithiya Sharma of Gather Around Sisters to host an event for plus size women. There she met Ameya and got connected. “We met again a week later. I spoke to her about the idea of a podcast talking about fat liberation and she offered to help me. But I said – No, do it with me”. And that’s how Fat. So? was born.
Also read:
I Don’t Have A Perfect Body. Do You?
The team ran Season 1 with 10 episodes from November 2019 to March 2020. They covered topics related to sex, clothes, food, the word fat itself. They spoke about the joys and sorrows of being a fat woman in India and their experiences and learnings.
Yet, topics related to body shaming have faced a slew of trolls. When asked the same, they replied, trolls will always be there, but they shouldn’t impact you. “The topics we discuss are no attempt to educate the masses but to share a candid conversation about the joys and sorrows of being fat women in India. We are privileged, exposed, and have the access to resources, opportunities, and networks that many don’t. The topics we discuss are very relevant to our own lives”.
To come out of this situation, Fat. So? said that “the only way to revolutionize anything is by being the change. No hero is waiting outside to save us. Many of us are speaking about our lives and our journeys of liberation. It’s the Internet age, and the barriers of the community are broken every day. So, find your community and be the change – even if it’s a small change in your life”.
The inspiration behind the idea
In 2014, Pallavi read books and articles of Tess Holliday, Gurleen Khandpur, Virgie Tovar, Whitney Way Thore, Ragen Chastain, and Hanne Blank. This gave her a deeper understanding of the subject and helped in shifting her own mindset around being fat.
Then, Lindo Bacon’s “Heath at Every Size” helped Pallavi understand that fat can be as healthy as thin can be unhealthy. Today, there are even more role models around us, including Ameya, acknowledges Pallavi.
For Pallavi, inspiration comes from her own life and it changed once she accepted fat liberation. She said, “Sometimes, I feel like I was born again and it was so powerful. Also, I know there are so many like me who are hurting themselves and I want to say to them – please don’t”.
Society has created the norms of beauty standards and fed us things about what’s healthy and good for us. And here is Pallavi, Ameya, and other women like her experiencing a different reality. So, these two ladies suggest that we go online with an open mind and research more on fat liberation, the impact of fat on bodies, and health at every size.
We asked Ameya the same question, and she replied, “You’re not alone and you don’t have to adhere to what society tells you. I suppose my inspiration for this podcast is Pallavi”. This shows how Ameya and Pallavi support each other.
Nonetheless, these days, a lot of people look at brand influencers and try to become like them. “The current generation millennials seem more sorted. Even though they have so many inputs they still seem to be able to express themselves, unlike us while growing up. So, it’s not just influencers, but also parents, teachers, doctors, and every other authority that needs to change their narrative”, says Fat. So? about the current social stigma.
People should think about what makes them special first. It’s great to have a role model or an idol to look up to, but decisions should be taken independently. The moment one stops comparing himself/herself with the other person, they can add so much value to their life. “As a coach and an energy aligner, I helped almost 1000 people to find what’s special within themselves. And I know how empowering that is” professes Pallavi.
Challenges in the journey
The Fat. So? team has not faced any challenges in doing the podcast, except the fatphobia rooted in society and the approach towards it. “The world does not take fat people into account and that is wrong, you are telling a whole section of the population that they do not deserve to exist.”, says Fat. So?
Due to reasons like these, and trolls on social media about their looks and appearance, a lot of them end up suffering mental health issues. So, Fat. So? has also done an episode on mental health. “For example, in Season 2 – we spoke about fatphobia, fat liberation, and mental health. We had a far deeper exploration of how being fat has affected us than we did in Season 1” shares Fat. So? on the topics covered on mental health in their previous episodes.
Recently, Fat. So? got 100k views and 500 trolls on the interview with Brut India. Here’s the reaction post-interview – “Our friends and loved ones were horrified at this response. What they don’t realize is that these are the people we meet in our daily lives. These are the things we have heard all our lives from our family and loved ones. So, it’s not so shocking and impactful when you hear it from a troll”.
To bring an impactful change on mental health, “parents, teachers, doctors have to stop saying it. Industries that thrive on false beauty, health, and other norm-based standards should change. Policies and research need to be inclusive of fat people”.
Listen to Fat. So?
You can listen to the episodes Fat. So? podcase on all the podcast apps, namely, Apple, Spotify, Google, Castbox, etc. So far, the response has been incredible. They have women of all ages, nationalities, sizes, and some men as well, writing in to tell them about how the podcast resonates with them to accept their outlook towards the world.
“Stories that we received made us cry. We thought to impact at least one person’s life, but looking at the response, there are so many out there – Mission Accomplished.” Fat. So? thanks all its listeners.
The primary goal of this podcast and the efforts of these two amazing women is to make the conversation around fat women available and accessible. “The reason we keep doing it is that perhaps there are even more people out there that we could impact” expresses Fat.So?
Moving forward, they have exciting plans to interact more on social media. “Fatso? Season 2 began in October 2020, but we had to pause it due to some concerns with our distribution partner. We’ll keep the updates posted on our social media handles (@fatsopodcast)”, shares Fat. So? about their next plans.